Today is my Papa's 24th year of rest. I was only 10 when he passed and his was the first funeral I ever attended. Although I was young and recall running around after much younger kids to keep them busy on this sad day...I still remember my titas, my mom and dad, and especially my belated Mama's reaction.
I was guiding Mama into the room. She was dressed all in black (a color she wore for one full year that it became her color of choice). While walking her up to the entrance, she stopped, looked over to her husband lying in what seemed like his sleep and placed both of her hands over her face. Then she whispered in Tagalog, "What am I going to do now?" (This sentence resonates with me since it was also the same line my sissy said when my brother passed away a year ago).
I held Mama's arm, nudged her forward, very slowly and said nothing (just like I did with my sissy). To me, this question never needs a response. All I knew was I had to be there for them to say goodbye and so that I can say goodbye too.
In Remembrance,
Myrnelle
In Remembrance,
Myrnelle
6 comments:
May he continue to rest in peace. My how times have changed huh?
Joseph u said it ol' neighbor... Sigh, life's so crazy amazing aint it? And regardless of what it throws @ us, we have to all nudge forward.
Awww Nelly. I remember his funeral in the Philippines. Unlike you, I don't remember much. My reaction to death is one of disconnection. I haven't figured that one out yet. But I do miss him. I remember he would have his Budweiser after work. Then he'd ask us to tell him a story about our day. I also remember when I was about 10 or so, I would call him after school usually on Fridays and ask him to pick us up from the house knowing my mom wanted us to do some chores after school. Then I'd call my mom from there and tell her that papa just showed up and made us go with him! Lol!!
Last night, I had some cooking bananas that were getting over ripe. I was too lazy to fry them so I cooked them the way mama used to. Do you remember? She would boil them with a little water and sugar. I'm not sure if she added vanilla and cinnamon but I did. It brought me way back!!!! I miss them so much!!
Aww Krys Strong, Ate thx for sharing! I think it's great remembering more of what it was like when he was alive vs. the day he left us... My memories are a lil' jaded since Papa was no ordinary grandfather!!! He gave me my 1st sip of beer! This may explain why I hate beer! Lol! Also one time I almost fell out of his Pinto while on the road! He held me up by the collar, cursing in Tagalog as the car rolled up to a stop. Then I had the audacity to ask if I can still play outside! Ah the craziness!!
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