Mama is Forever Loved

OH dearest Mama Mama Mama. She is just an amazing amazing amazing person! no words to express. She will always be remembered in my heart and the families. I miss her sooo much. I think about her everyday, i think back to the times where she was so active in cooking, cleaning, going to church, making sure everyone isn't hungry etc etc.


I remember times where i used to go to school at Hamilton, and i would always walk to mamas house down the street. The first thing i would do is greet her with a hug and kiss, and the first thing she would always say to me was "Princess, did you eat?" or "Princess, are you hungry?". WOW, there were many many times i got annoyed of that but who didn't ?! We all knew she cared very much and made sure we all did not go hungry and if we were full. I appreciate everything she has done for me and my family. She took in my mother as if we were a part of her family and i know my mom loves her very very much. I am so blessed me and my family got to know and be a part of mamas family. She loved each and everyone in her family so much and you can just see it with her beautiful smile she kept all the years I've known her, which has been since i was born. Mama keeps the family going each and everyday. I love her for that. She is forever loved and will never ever be forgotten in my heart. I Love You Ma! :)




-Princess Amontos

Our Mama

Thank you everyone for being here today. I am Anthony Dizon and I am honored to have the opportunity to speak for a few minutes about my Mama, our Mama, whose life we are celebrating here today together.

Mama would be very pleased and grateful to see that you all could make it here this morning to share in this with us, as it was her family and friends who were the most important focus of her life. It was also your continued support, well wishes and prayers which were so valuable to her and to the family during her difficult times.

In addition to your presence here, we have received many, many expressions of sympathy, by phone calls, cards, e-mails, text messages, flowers, as well as from family and friends who were able to come to the viewing yesterday and the other day but couldn’t be here with us today.

Before I go on to celebrate Mama and what she stood for I must share with you the reality of what life was like for Mama and the family since she was first diagnosed with Alzheimer's about 3 years ago. Of course, nobody suffered more than Mama, but we all shared my mother’s pain. It was like we were all on trial.

At any one point, as a family, we were in denial, we were angry, or we were depressed. And there was conflict. We disagreed with the doctor’s and nurse’s findings. We didn’t always agree with each other on a course of action. It was a confusing moment.

In the end I felt we all put up a real good fight. We did what we could do, Together! Mama was showered with love and care by everyone.

I could talk for hours and provide numerous examples demonstrating her remarkable independence, including, of course, her strength to carry on being around us after my father passed away in 1990.

Her generosity with her time, her energy, her advice, and in so many other ways provided invaluable support to a remarkable number of people. She not only cared for 5 daughters and 2 sons, she found ways to also care for a lot of her grandchildren and great grandchildren.

My mother had an extraordinary ability to make each of us feel stronger and more confident in our own identity, giving us our own sense of independence and mental toughness which, speaking for myself, has been such an asset in so many ways in my life.

The one incident I would never forget with Mama was when I got my very first paycheck here in the US. (2 weeks of pay with overtime – still a very small amount back then). Anyway, I came to her and said, "Ma, you can have this." Right away, she gave me advice on how I should learn how to save and value what I have worked for. I can’t remember now if Mama ended up keeping that first paycheck, or if I saved it, or if my father spent it – as he was a spender. But from that day on, at that early stage of my adult life, Mama showed me the importance and value of hard work.

Mama is meticulous on how she cares for her personal belongings. Her clothes are folded and stored neatly in her closets. She likes to keep the house especially her room clean all the time – unfortunately for my wife and my 2 sons, I am just as meticulous as my mother.

She liked to hide her important stuff in a way that no one could think of. But when the illness started, our weekend visits became a treasure hunt game for the family trying to find where she hid them because she couldn’t remember where they were. We find it for her so she can hide it again.

These memories along with many others will live in our hearts forever.

I will always be extremely proud to call myself the son of Mama.

Mama, I am going to miss you so much! Truth is I already miss you.

Love your youngest son,

Anthony

Unforgettable Memories

I had so many unforgettable memories with Mama being with her for many, many years. This woman was a hardworking, caring, loving & adorable person. She was very organized in everything. All the things at home (i.e. kitchen, bathroom) should be clean and there were notes all over the place that read:

"Don't touch"
"Keep it clean"
"Turn off lights"
"Close it properly"

and many more...

I will miss these little notes from her. She left many memories behind and I will keep it in my heart forever.

Mama wherever you are, whatever you do I LOVE YOU SO MUCH! I am so lucky to have you as my mother-in-law, mother, adviser, and the best MAMA for us. We will miss you forever.

Maria Carina - she called me both names :)

Alyssa was only 7 days old here (12/3/06). Mama was our first stop once we got out of the hospital. We couldn't wait for her to meet another great-grandchild! Jordan was very proud and was excited to introduce them to each other! I remember as Alyssa & Jordan got older they would make a little more noise when we would go visit mama - she would worry so much about them. She was always so concerned that they would hurt themselves and would tell me, "Oh - yung mga bata - baka masaktan." Or when they were really loud, "Ang ingay ng bata - magulo!" Oh, mama - we miss you so much!
Here's our family with dear mama! I can still hear her voice! She always asked me if she could carry Alyssa. "Pakarga ang baby..."
We miss you mama!
Love,
Krys, Allan, Jordan & Alyssa Strong

A Rainy Day

This is my part of the eulogy for dear mama at her funeral:

Good Morning, my name is Krys and I am the second to the oldest grandchild of mama.

On behalf of all of my grandmother’s grandchildren, I’d like to thank all of you for visiting with us the past few days. It was very comforting to have you here with us.
Even though mama was ill for some time, we expected this day to come soon. However – it didn’t make today an easier.
She was a great woman in her day! So as her body is laid to rest - I don’t want you to remember her like this – nor the way she was when she was ill. Because that was not who she was!
Remember the woman who I recall being so stubborn when she had her mind set on something. On several occasions she’d tell me, “I can do it! I’m strong – you know Christine – if there’s a will there’s a way!” And you know what – she’d do it!
I remember her going on her daily walks around the block. She was also very conscientious about what she would eat. She had a lot of discipline when it came to exercise and being healthy – now that I think about it – I should have paid more attention to that!
This woman was very independent. I was about 10 yrs old or so and I went on my first bus ride ever & it was with mama. She needed to buy something from Fedco but no one was available at the time – but she didn’t let that stop her!
Posture was also very important to mama. When we were much younger, I remember her telling us to always sit up and stand up straight. If she ever caught us hunched over – she’d poke our backs with no mercy! She’d say, “Look at me – I’m much older than you but my back is straight!”
My grandmother is someone I am very proud of. She was truly a great woman. She was the perfect example of strength, determination, discipline, courage – and oh, good posture! She was a godly woman, a devout catholic up to the end. I know that her legacy will continue with her grandchildren and great grandchildren.
So I hope that in some way she had also touched your lives in some way. Be it – cooking something for you when you came to visit, listening to you when you needed a friend, giving you advice in your time of need, celebrating with you, or even as simple as sewing on a button for you.
I’d like to share this poem with you. It’s not something I wrote – just something I came across the other day.

A Rainy Day
Things are not as bad

As they now may seem to be

Your life will still go on

Even though it’s without me

These are not tears of sadness on

this day of rain

Please look at them as tears of joy

For I am now free of pain

You can not know the freedom

Or the peace that I now feel

I hope this is some comfort

As you all now learn to deal

The battle now is over

And in many ways I’ve won

While you might think it is raining

I am warm amidst the sun

Love,

Krys Strong

A Drop of Love Photo courtesy of www.flickr.com

Guardian Angel

Below is the eulogy Maribelle Dizon wrote and read for our dearest Mama:

Good Morning.

I'm here today to share a few thoughts with you about our Mama.

In my household, I joked that my sister Michelle is my dad's favorite, my sister Myrnelle is my mom's favorite and that I will always be Mama's favorite.

And for me...that's the reason for all the heartaches, headaches, and crazy memories I will forever cherish...of times spent with my Mama.

She definitely had a hand in raising me - teaching me to be independent, respectful, and to never forget that FAMILY comes FIRST.

When she became sick, it was the most unfair, horrible thing to do a woman so strong and valuable. The true Heart of the Dizon Family.

But I understand now that her memories will live on in ours...and in my childhood.

Her spirit is with us now and will see us into the future.

When times get tough, when we're stressing, while we're celebrating an occasion, and when we're smiling...I know she'll be watching.

I love you Ma. Not only are you the foundation of this family, now you're our Guardian Angel too.

Thank you. -Bea

A Son's Goodbye

Below is the eulogy Mama's eldest son, Froy Dizon wrote and read for our dearest Mama:

I’d like to begin by acknowledging everyone that are gathered here today to help celebrate the life of our dear mother Agripina, Auntie Piring to other family members, and or simply as “Mama” to those very close to her.

All us of have a story to share on the life of my mother. I’d like to share a few of those memorable moments in no particular order of importance:

• During my second year with the Catholic School, I managed to get kicked out in the middle of the semester due to insubordination. Mama was not thrilled, but she found another school I can temporarily attend as I went through the transition. I couldn’t be happier; I was the smartest kid in the class of “C” students!
  

• As the authoritarian, she will not allow us to hang out late with friends, so the few times I managed to sneak out I got busted! One time she ran her finger on my arm, leaving a white streak and then blurted out, “You went swimming!” I thought I was doomed!

• I think I was in 4th grade and I was seeing this girl in our class. My teacher thought I was getting too involved and in order to get my mother’s attention, she lowered my grades (but wrote it in pencil). Sure enough, the next day Mama came marching straight to the principal’s office and the next thing I knew she was talking to the girl while we were standing in line before the school started! Needless to say I was labeled a “Mama’s Boy” from that day on.
  

• When I got married at a young age, Mama was there to offer her support and understanding.
  

• I remember the first time she taught me how to cook. She had on patches covering her eyes and between the sizzling of the steak, and the fan I couldn’t hear her. So I dragged her closer, but forgot she couldn’t see and she ended up on the floor on her rear end! Shocked, I couldn’t say anything but then I laughed. She cursed me out, but then laughed with me.
  

• We took Mama just about everywhere we went: Las Vegas, San Francisco, Mexico, local casinos, weddings, birthdays and many special events. It’s always been an on-going joke with close friends that if you invite me, you need to include Mama too.
  

I’d like to think that with the help of my siblings (Thelma, Tessie, Ging, Bott, Connie, and Anthony), in-laws, grandchildren, cousins and friends, and most especially my wife Maria and 3 beautiful daughters that we had filled her life with unconditional love and affection.

Most of all without Mama’s love, support and understanding I will not be where I am today.

Again, to all our relatives and friends who are here with us today especially to our extended family in San Francisco and those that could not be with us, thank you for your prayers and support.

Lovingly, Froy

Ken Who? Ken Lew!

I don't know if she ever did know me... I'm sure she recognized me though. It's not everyday you see some random big Chinese guy come into your room and say hi to you. hahaha. I wish I knew her better. I bet she would cook some real good food and I know if I knew her back then, she'd make me stop everything to sit down and eat something she might have cooked. Seeing and experiencing the Dizon family as a whole, I can feel the love that she has inspired. You tend to see how a person is through their children so I know she must have been a great, supportive, understanding, strong and very loving person. The family is a great reminder of her and the bond that you share is a symbol that her life was not wasted but in fact, wonderfully blessed. The love you give to each other and to others is a huge reflection of what mama really was. I don't think she ever said a word to me, but she didn't need to. The family has said more than enough to make me feel welcomed and part of the family as soon as I stepped foot into the house. I remember the first time I met her was when we all went to the tennis club for her birthday party. Gosh, I don't even know how old she was, but I couldn't stop thinking about how much everyone loved her. I went up to her and gave her a kiss on her cheek and said, "happy birthday mama" And she probably thought, "Odick! You've gotten so big and so Chinito!" hahaha. Either that or "Who the heck are you? Go and eat now." haha but really, all she did was looked at me and smiled and that's all I really needed to know.

To the Family, my thoughts and prayers are with you. She left this lifetime knowing that she raised a family that she can be proud of. That will continue to live her teachings of compassion, respect, support, kindness, but most of all, love. I know she left happy and made God proud. I never knew my grandmother, but if I did, I'd hope that she would be someone like mama.

Continue to be strong like mama :)

Love,
Ken Lew

P.S. I wish I could be there. My heart and thoughts are with you all.

What I Remember Most About Mama

I remember coming over to play with Maribelle as a child. And she was always in the kitchen cooking or in the living room with one pink roller in her hair. Always asking us if we’re hungry or need anything. Or whenever we would play, she always tells us to be quiet, because we would laugh and play to loud.

I remember her always asking Maribelle where she was going and what time she'd be home. She always worried about her and wanted to make sure she was safe. I remember sitting in the living room doing homework and looking at the painting of her and her husband. And thought how beautiful she looked. And could see the joy and love in her eyes.

But what I remember the most about mama was her smile and laugh. And whenever she did, you couldn’t stop smiling too.

-Maria Lampasona, close friend of Maribelle Dizon

The Unchanging Self

Dearest Mama,

"Welcome home..." is what I hear them saying to you, honoring your presence, and celebrating all that you have accomplished in your fruitful life. You have come home to reunite with your beloved heart mate, Papa Gonzalo, and to once again be in the presence of your brother and sisters. You are Divine, Mama, and I'm going to miss your elegance, beauty, DIVANESS, and loving kindness. Congratulations on a job well done.

I am with you always
with you at all times.
With every whisper of the wind
I am calling your name.
With the rising and shining of the sun
I am caressing your spirit.
And at each time you smile
I am dancing with you.

You are our beloved Mama.
Be well.

Love,
Rod Penalosa

Smiles, Karaoke and Eggrolls!

While there are many things I will carry with me about Mama from the last twenty years, there are a few that especially stand out to me.

The first is her smile. Whenever she smiled, and she did that a lot, her whole face would light up. The apples of her cheeks would get all rosy, her teeth would show and her soulful eyes would completely disappear! I loved to see that because it just showed how genuinely happy she could get about things. And most of the time, those smiles were accompanied by giggles-whether it be at something Bea did, Nelly said or when Michelle would tease her about something. And once she started giggling, it got all of us going! I actually remember the first time she met my son Vaughn and held him. She sat him on her lap and just kept smiling at him while he looked up at her with his bobble-head and I remember thinking how crazy it was that my kids would now learn her smile and that thought actually warmed me up inside.

Mama also liked to listen to Karaoke. As some of you may know, I love singing and we girls would stay up hours, with mics in our hands, pretending to be superstars! And Mama would just go about her business in the house, popping in once a while with a request. She always asked me to sing Silent Night, whether it was Christmas time or the middle of July, it didn't matter! I guess she liked my rendition, LOL! Or she would really put me on the spot and ask me to sing a song in Tagalog. And of course, I had to oblige because I couldn't very well say no to her, could I? None of us could! So, I would sing the song requested, whether I understood what I was saying or not, and she would pop her head into the living room when I was finished, with one of those Mama smiles and clap, saying "Beautiful Pam, beautiful!" and then pop back out. Silent Night will always be my song for her....

Eggrolls!!!!! This is perhaps my fondest memory of Mama. I was over one day to play with Nelly, we couldn't have been more than ten or eleven years old. Mama and Dad were cooking, of course, and she had just set up the table with everything needed to make eggrolls. I happened to walk past her for one reason or another and the next thing I know, she's telling me to wash my hands and come sit down, an eggroll making lesson was about to begin. Of course, I did as she requested. So, here I am, learning how to roll eggrolls from the best and she's watching every move I make, LOL! "No, that's too loose", "that one is too small", she kept after me until I learned to do it just right. Poor Nelly ended up rolling too because of the "HELP ME!!!" look I gave her as she walked by. Mama was firm in teaching us how to do it but always supportive. We sat there for over an hour making them and though it was stressful at times, we still had so much fun with her, learning, chatting and laughing.

Even with something as trivial as making eggrolls or singing Karaoke, I wanted her to be proud of me. I wanted her to know how much I respected her as the matriarch of my second family. I felt she loved me with her gentle taps on my shoulder, her smiles and her quiet appreciation of little things I did, or the way she looked at my kids. That meant so much to me. I will miss her very much but my heart will never miss the love I have for her, that will forever be ingrained within me.

Pam

To Everyone, to my Family

I wanted to share with everyone a memory of "our mama" that will forever be with me.

Years ago during one of our "many" family get-togethers, with everyone eating, talking and having a good time, I noticed mama sitting down and very quietly looking around at everyone around her. The kids were running around, the Titas (aunts) were at the dining room table sharing stories and laughing, the Titos (uncles) were outside also sharing stories and laughing. I sat down next to her and asked her what was wrong and why was she so quiet?

She looked at me and said, "Michelle, there are so many people here, we have such a big family that we can't even fit in this house!" (But she said it in Tagalog, of course).

And I paused for a moment and looked around and I said to her "Well mama, don't you know that if it wasn't for you, none of us would be here?"

And she looked at me with so much happiness that I could feel it in my heart. And at first I didn't understand why what I said meant so much to her because I truly thought she knew that, but I guess just like all of us, once in awhile we need to hear it.

That was years before "our mama" got sick and I remember that moment like it was yesterday because I feel that now more than ever she needs to hear how much she means to all of us again.

So through this I ask for everyone to tell her, through prayer, "Mama, you are loved! That you are someone's faithful wife, loving sister, tita and cousin. That you are someone's beautifiul daughter, hard working mother, cherished grandmother, and proud great-grandmother. A friend and my hero. Without you, Ma I am nothing. And as I write this email, I have tears of joy because God brought you into my father's life and gave me the strength to go through what I've been through in my life and still be here today and hopefully one day my grandchild can say to me, 'Don't you know that if wasn't for you, none of us would be here too.'

~I love you Ma.

Your Granddaughter,~Michelle

Anak (Child) by Freddie Aguilar

This was Mama's favorite song.

Noong isilang ka sa mundong ito,
Laking tuwa ng magulang mo.
At ang kamay nila
ang iyong ilaw.

At ang nanay at tatay mo,
'Di malaman ang gagawin.
Minamasdan pati pagtulog mo.

Sa gabi napupuyat ang iyong nanay
Sa pagtimpla ng gatas mo.
At sa umaga nama'y kalong
Ka ng iyong amang tuwang-tuwa sa iyo.

Ngayon nga'y malaki ka na,
Nais mo'y maging malaya.
'Di man sila payag,
Walang magagawa.

Ikaw nga'y biglang nagbago,
Naging matigas ang iyong ulo.
At ang payo nila'y,
Sinuway mo.

Hindi mo man lang inisip
Na ang kanilang ginagawa'y para sa iyo.
Pagka't ang nais mo masunod ang layaw mo,
'Di mo sila pinapansin.

Nagdaan pa ang mga araw
At ang landas mo'y naligaw
Ikaw ay nalulon
sa masamang bisyo.

At ang una mong nilapitan
Ang iyong inang lumuluha.
At ang tanong,
"Anak, ba't ka nagkaganyan?"

At ang iyong mga mata'y biglang lumuha
Ng 'di mo napapansin
Pagsisisi ang sa isip mo,
Nalaman mong ika'y nagkamali.

Just passing by...

I just passed by and read about Mama. It's been so long for me since last I talked, seen or spoke to her. Of course my times knowing her were not positive in the begining. She would give me the evil eye and cold stare cause she couldn't figure me out. However, being the open and warmhearted person I am, she warmed up to me and I began to see the loving open side of her. She totally accepted me and as I read these blog entries, I remembered the family get-togethers and your Mama's calculated glances that said a lot without a sound. I remember when she would be cooking and sewing at the kitchen table and how she waltzed back into her room. It is hard to pass by and to see how time brings snap shots of great moments and good times, but to not have a cherished one is the hardest to deal with.

Your Mama's legacy will never be forgotton through Michelle, Maribelle, Myrnelle Tito Froy, Tita Maria, Cat, Krys, and all the Dizon's and extended family. That includes me and anybody who had the pleasure of knowing and loving your Mama. I lost my GMa last year 4/09/07, but it is something that never leaves you because through you they live.

-Yo boi Ken Jackson (old friend)

I couldn't help but read about Mama. I had no idea she passed. I'm sorry. I do remember as if it were yesterday she greeted me at the side door whenever I came to visit. She would always speak to me in Tagalog and even though I only got the gist of what she was saying I didn't have the heart to tell her that I understood Ilocano better. She was always very hospitable to me and I'm sorry she's no longer with your family. I never really grew up close to my grandparents and now they're in the Philippines. It seems as though I didn't miss them until reading these blogs... but now they're half a world away...

Hope all is well with you and your family!

Take care,Bren (Granddaughter Myrnelle Dizon's old friend)

it's never goodbye...

when its time for people 2 leave this life and space, they only go N2 a different space that is completely around us. just cause we can't C them or feel them, doesn't mean that they R not there, they R in a different form, and surround us in a way we could never be consumed by someone. love never dies, it lives 4ever. if u open ur heart and mind, u will see this is true.

-truth angel

(Granddaughter Myrnelle Dizon's close friend)

Orchid for Mama

Hi family,

I think Lola made her presence known to me today. One of the clinical scientists I support came by my desk and dropped of this big bowl of orchid buds as a thank you for what I’ve been doing for him. I thought about it and one of the last times I saw Lola Piring was before Ricky and I left for our honeymoon. We came by their place and dropped mama an orchid plant to cheer up her room. It’s ironic that I got orchids today of all days (also this is the first time any of my clinical scientists have ever given me a gift). =)

I attached the picture of the flowers. It’s so pretty with just one lighter orchid in the middle (I think that one is mama) =)

-Ruth Penalosa Manalo

My Keepsake

I'm sitting here sewing a lose button onto my sister's jacket realizing that i am now the sewer of buttons, clasps, and garment holes for my family. It makes me miss how my grandmother was when she was in perfect health, cuz this was her job and there was no one else better at it.

So here i am, rummaging through the sewing kit given to me that used to be hers, wondering why all the thread keeps getting wrapped around the damn pin cushion (shaped like a tomato) and why i still keep the picture of the Virgin Mary in this box even though i'm not religious...Laughing cuz the only threads in here that are practically used up are the browns and blacks and how the lid reads "keep well organized everytime" in black sharpie.

Every time i read it i wanna say "Well I can't keep it organized Ma cuz everything keeps getting tangled!" I'd like to say I'm making her proud, but I'm sure if she saw my sewing technique she'd smack the back of my head...with her slipper ...in full disapproval. It is bittersweet and I am glad though that this tupperware box full of rolls of thread and random pins was my grandma's sewing kit...and now my keepsake.

2/6/08 <3 Bea

(Granddaughter Maribelle Dizon)